Saturday, December 6, 2008

Initial Impressions (by James)

James here. I wanted to share my current emotions and feelings.

First off, I am extremely grateful and feel that God has blessed Amanda with this pregnancy. I will be the first to admit that I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I have made the decision to "live in the moment" and not fear of the unknown.

After months of trying to conceive, I will be honest, I reached the point that I did not think we were going to ever able to conceive again. Amanda and I had recently come to realize that we would be content with this and pursue adoption further. God, thankfully, has other plans!

I have been extremely emotional. In my prayer time, meditation, listening to Christmas music, etc... I get overwhelmed with joy and tears in a matter of seconds. Leading up to this pregnancy, I "just knew" everything would be easy once we conceived. Not so. I realize there is so much that could go wrong at the blink of an eye based on our prior history in pregnancies. Yet, I am grateful!

I want to tell all my friends and the kids today, but know I can't yet. It's hard, especially for the kids. They want a baby brother/sister so bad. Gracie prays for that (literally) every night. I am thankful for those few friends we have told and appreciate their prayers and intercessions. The last 5 days have been joyous, and has made this Christmas season extra special.

Baby, I am praying for you.

2 comments:

DeDe said...

This is so sweet James - thanks for sharing your heart.

I remember my heart aching when Gracie was over here after Thanksgiving - she was playing with Rebecca and telling how much she wanted to be a big sister. I told her she would be a wonderful big sister and that God had a great plan for her and to be patient.

Love you guys!

Randi said...

I love reading it from James' perspective. Praying for you guys and trusting that God has an amazing plan to prosper your family.